sango-blep:

help-mywife:

help, my wife got wine drunk and tried to set our marriage certificate on fire, saying “good luck trying to return me without the receipt”

„not if I can set it on fire first“

(via help-mywife)

cosmic-noir:

africanaquarian:

i have been in a certain mood lately but i’m not emotionally intelligent enough to fully articulate it

(via gay-worm-committing-sins)

comickit:

i’m simple….this is my fav character dynamic

alternatively 

(via gay-worm-committing-sins)

griffys:

love too big for she goddamn heart

(via gay-worm-committing-sins)

kaijulovingfreak:

kaijulovingfreak:

smstransformers:

kaijulovingfreak:

smstransformers:

Robot cummies

Hey James do you take constructive criticism?

Only on business days

Fine I’ll wait

This post fucking sucks

(via gay-worm-committing-sins)

dragon-in-a-fez:

officialprydonchapter:

captain-trashcan:

dizzyotter:

mandokamagica:

hello everyone if u have a cat that u believe needs protection you can email the san francisco cat museum and they will add your cat to the list of cats under the protective paw of Bastet the Egyptian goddess of cats http://www.catmuseumsf.org/protectpaw.html

okay but actually pls read the list of existing names on this

(via gay-worm-committing-sins)

the-fury-of-a-time-lord:

lynchhes:

rb w what ur local blockbuster was replaced with

mine is a Five Guys

not joking, it’s a church now

(via gothclaires)

bane-of-technology:

bigmouthlass:

sarapsys:

streetlifemanifesto:

Don’t trust morning you. Morning you is a dick. Morning you would sell your loved ones if it got them 5 minutes of extra sleep

maybe morning me wouldn’t be such a dick if that flaky bitch evening me had gone to bed instead of tumblring til butts oclock int he morning

Well evening me might have fallen asleep at a reasonable hour if that dumbass afternoon me hadn’t lain down for a “little nap” that lasted four hours.

Originally posted by twintherapists

(via willjamesjacekitherondale)